Beautiful Day

Today was absolutely awesome.

Warm and sunny after a week of cold rain.

Such a blessing.

Ian and I took the children and Willow over to a nearby rec centre to play some basketball and to let Wills run off-leash for a bit. Watching him run full out in the sun just made me so happy.

Ian played basketball with Sam and Julie while I hung out with Jordan at the park. It looked closer than it was, and I thought I'd die walking there, but she loved it. There was a skate park there as well, and the kids exhausted themselves running up the ramps.

Afterwards we picked up some lunch to bring home, and Jordan and I took very long naps this afternoon.

Hamburgers on the grill for dinner, and a quiet evening together.

I didn't think about work at all today.

I didn't think about the stress and uncertainty we are enduring these days.

I just enjoyed being with the family I am so deeply in love with, and thanking the Lord for giving me such a full and beautiful life.

I hope you had a wonderful Saturday too.

:-)

Belated Easter Update

I love Easter. It's my favourite holiday, even more than Christmas.

I'm not sure what was going on with me last Easter, but I completely missed feeling the whole meaning of it all. It was just another holiday.

I hated that so much.

This year though... wow. I felt the burden and sadness of Good Friday, and the weight of what Christ took on for us. For me. For you.

Friday morning we took the children to church and went to the children's service. Our new-ish youth pastor did a fantastic job of telling the story of Christ's crucifixion in a way that kept all of the children's attention.

Afterwards we headed home for lunch and naps. Late in the afternoon I put a pot of eggs on to boil and was reminded yet again how challenging it is for me to produce a properly boiled egg! No matter, they worked out. I wasn't sure if Sam and Julie would still be interested in decorating eggs, but they were all over it.

Growing up we always decorated hard boiled eggs. Ian likes his raw so he can blow out the yoke and then decorate it. We did both this year. Jordan was all over it too. Afterwards we picked up a pizza and watched a movie together.

Saturday Ian and I ran Easter errands in the morning, then we all went to visit his parents in the afternoon for dinner.

I was so excited on Sunday morning! To wake and know that it was Easter Sunday was so exciting and I couldn't wait to get to church to worship the risen Lord. The kids did their Easter hunt, then we headed out to church.

Fabulous, joyful and heartfelt worship filled our morning. I was so happy.

After lunch and a nap we headed over to my mom's for a delicious ham dinner.

I hated going back to work on Monday morning! And having Jordan follow me to the front door asking me to stay home with her didn't help.

I don't have any Easter pictures to share with you because I was just too busy enjoying myself with my family.

Not much going on 'round these parts. I'll be 32 weeks pregnant on Saturday. Time is really beginning to move quickly now.

How was YOUR Easter?

He is RISEN!

Good Friday

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

I cannot imagine the depth of love that God has for us, that He would give His only child so that we would have everlasting life.

The willingness of Jesus to give His life for us is something I cannot comprehend.

Did you know, that even if it was just for you, He would still give His life for you?

He loved you so much that He would rather die for you than live without you!

Amazing.

I pray that you know Him.

If you don't, let's talk.

Prayer Request ~ Update!

I am so relieved that this day is over.

I was so nervous about this ultrasound that I had nightmares all night.

But!

Baby Matthew looked wonderful and healthy. Everything looked ok, he was breathing well, I have enough amniotic fluid, etc and I didn't need to go upstairs to Labour and Delivery for any further testing.

He has two arms and two legs.

We saw his little fists moving all around and watched him kicking at my bladder (ouch!).

She estimated his weight at 5lbs. Holy pickles!!

He is currently in a transverse position and said he should be head down in a few weeks.

Thank you to those who left encouraging comments here on my blog, or reached out on facebook and twitter. It helped so much to know that you were praying for me and for our little boy.

I'm looking forward to having a solid night's sleep!

Prayer Request

This afternoon I will be having a bio-physical profile done to check on the baby. I'm told it's an ultrasound with a scoring system to check on the baby's health.

I've shared before that I'm on medication to control my blood pressure, and at my last appointment my pressure was it's highest yet.

I'm not a doctor, so forgive my lame explanations of things. Something about high blood pressure -> pre-eclampsia -> placental deterioration = uh oh.

I'm praying that all is well with this precious little guy that we've decided to name Matthew.

Still...

Satan has been whispering to me constantly the last few weeks and he's wearing me down.

Your baby is going to die.

I have dreams of missing limbs, of facial deformities. Of stillbirth.

I'm afraid to look at the ultrasound screen because of what I might - and might not - see.

I have three perfectly healthy children. A fourth seems too much to ask.

I feel horrible even posting these fears. ALL children have beauty and purpose.

Oh how I love him already. Nothing will change that.

Will you pray for our little Matthew today? I'd appreciate it so much.

I'll update you all tonight.

Thank you <3

Update On Sam

Sunday night already. Why oh why must the weekends pass by so quickly?

Just a quick update on Sam: Ian met with two police officers the other day to discuss the issue with this kid in Sam's class. Long story short, they can't really do anything right now. But... when this kid turns 12 it's a different story. Apparently if he was already 12, the police would have charged him and he'd be expelled from the school. So, we wait.

We were under the impression that this kid had a 2-day suspension but that wasn't true. He was back at school on Friday and back to punching Sam and calling him dirty names. Now Ian is angry. He called the principal and she's going to "investigate" and make calls on Monday. Ian told her he expects a call on Monday and wants this stopped now.

Go Ian GO!

In other Sam news, he sprained his ankle on Friday night at youth group. I wanted him to see a doctor on Saturday just to rule out anything really serious, so Ian took him to the walk-in clinic, who then sent him to the hospital. They took an x-ray but nothing was fractured and said it was just a sprain. He's been hobbling around on crutches all weekend.

My No-So-Proud-Mommy-Moment? I told Sam that if this kid cornered him and started hitting him, and he couldn't get away, hit him with a crutch.

Oh yeah. I said it.

Scold me if you need to, but I don't regret it. I want to smack that kid myself!

That's it for now. Hope you had a beautiful Palm Sunday :-)

Quick Update

I think I have reached that point in pregnancy when I turn into KateZilla. I am cranky.

No. I don't think so.

I know so.

Sigh.

Sunday I hardly got any sleep at all. The baby was kicking and poking me so hard, and it was after 4am before I could fall asleep, then I was up at 7 to get ready for work.

I had a really difficult time concentrating at work, and I managed to doze off in the bathroom.

I know. Gross.

I saw my doctor in the evening as scheduled. My blood pressure was higher than it's been so far, so he had me lay down for 10 minutes then took another reading and it was much better. The baby's heartbeat sounded lovely and steady. He sent me for more blood work, this time to check my liver function. I'm having another ultrasound - my fifth! - this Monday to make sure the baby is doing ok, and to make sure the placenta is functioning efficiently. He said that if there is anything "off" they will send me upstairs to labour and delivery. If they let me leave, then I can relax and know that all is well. I'm a little nervous.

Weight gain? 1 pound.

I don't get it.

Total weight gain so far is 3 lbs and he's pleased with that. I told ya, I'm fluffy. Fluffy peeps don't need to gain as much.

In other news, Sam had more trouble with that kid I've blogged about before. He was pushing Sam and punching him in the arm and chest. Sam tried walking away twice and this kid kept coming at him. So, Sam put him in a head-lock and punched him in the head three times and the kid went down. The principal has been investigating everything as there were several boys involved by the time it was over, and tomorrow there will be a police officer at the school to talk to the boys, and Ian has been asked to be there for 10am. I want to be there but I know I'll just run my mouth and make a mess of things.

I think pregnant women should be allowed to say whatever they want to. What's the point of having these raging hormones if we can't let go once in awhile???

Spring has sprung here and I'm loving every minute of it!

OK, that's about all I have to talk about tonight. I'm pooped and ready for bed!

Cranky, Crusty and Crabby...Oh My!

Yeah, so that blog title pretty much sums up how I'm feeling these last couple of days.

I hate feeling like this.

Yesterday I got tired of putting a smile on everything and just felt mad. I went to bed earlier than usual because nothing positive was coming out of my mouth and I wasn't being particularly sweet.

I cried for a bit. Prayed for a bit. Pulled out my crayons and colouring books for a bit. Tried to sleep.

It irks me how some people seem to have the easiest time with everything, while others are left to struggle over and over, for everything.

The job market is crap right now. Ian is trying so hard but no one will return his calls.

My head knows God is in control and He has a plan...but my heart tells me He has forgotten us. I know I can't give into my feelings so I'm trying to listen to my head more.

Our son is due in 11 weeks. There is so much uncertainty about the future that I can't even let myself get truly excited. I'm too caught up in the whole "what are we going to do if..."

It's a control thing, you know? I like to have control of what's going to happen, to know what to expect. Right now I've got nuthin. I can't see the future, I can't plan for it. All I can do is endure until things get better.

Ugh. Ugh. UGH!

Ian bought me a box of M&Ms and I just might eat.them.all.

/end whinefest

5QF ~ April 1

Oh my goodness, is it just me or did Friday come around super quick?

Not that I'm complaining mind you :-)

Tonight Julie is going to her first sleepover ever and she's so unbelievably excited. Me? Not so much. It's not that I don't want her to go, or that I have concerns about where she's going. It's just that I can't believe we're at sleepover age already, you know?

It will feel weird to not have her sleeping down the hall tonight. I'm sure she'll have a wonderful time though.

Ian and Sam will be at Jr High tonight, so Jordan and I will likely cuddle in my bed and watch a movie, then fall asleep together. We both like that.

Tomorrow night my family is coming for dinner to celebrate the girls' birthdays and I can't wait to see them. I love being with my family.

Do you have any big plans for the weekend?



Are you ready for some Five Question Friday fun? Me too!

1. Have you ever had surgery?

Yes, I've had a few surgeries. I've had my gallbladder removed, a D & C after my miscarriage, my wisdom teeth out and a cystoscopy to remove a cancerous tumour from my bladder.

2. Ever ride in an ambulance?

I've ridden in one twice. Once when my friend had an asthma attack at school and they called an ambulance. I sat in the front seat and it wasn't very dramatic. They didn't even turn the lights on even though I asked very nicely.

The second time was when Jordan was 1 and had croup. I rode in the back with her, holding her hand, and grilled the EMS dude about his whole personal life. He loved it! It was like Nosy Kate met Nosy Kate and we got along famously.

3. How are you in a medical emergency? Panicked? Calm?

I'd like to tell you that I'm cool as a cucumber but that wouldn't be the truth. My mind goes to the worst case scenario immediately, I panic and repeat myself a lot. Oh, and I cry. Which I am sure comes as a big shock to you.

4. Do you have a garden? Flowers or veggies?

I love the idea of a garden but I don't have a green thumb. All that planting and weeding and watering... bah. It makes me tired just thinking about it. Maybe I'll plant some flowers this spring. But probably not.

5. When did you move out of your parents house?

I lived at home until I got married. Truth is, if Ian hadn't married me I'd probably still be living at home. I'm sure my mother is most thankful Ian came along ;-)

That's a wrap!

Head on over to Mama M's blog My Little Life and join in on the fun!