Someone Is Bullying My Kid!

Last week Sam got into his first fight at school.

I was shocked. He is so mild. Such a peace keeper.

He came home from school and said his day was ok then went to his room. Shortly after, I got a call from the vice principal informing me of the fight. I'm sure he thought I was an idiot because I kept saying "My son? MY son was in a fight?" I was that shocked.

He said he couldn't give me names of the other children involved, but there had been an exchange of words that led to shoving, and that led to punching.

I felt the Mama Bear rising up in me. "Someone punched my kid?"

He said Sam's punishment was to serve detention for two recesses. Yikes. He lives for recess.

When I finished speaking with him, I called Sam upstairs to get his version. He said that the other boy was cheating at the game they were playing in gym class, and Sam made a comment to another student about it. The boy got right into Sam's face, swearing and chest bumping him.

The details are hazy at this point, but apparently Sam pushed him back and when they were in the change room, the other kid was yelling profanities at Sam and pushing him. Sam was in the middle of putting his shoes on when the kid pushed him, so he stood up and hit him with his shoe.

With.his.shoe.

Oh boy.

The boy retaliated with three punches: one to Sam's cheek, the next to his temple and the last to the side of his head.

Sam said he wasn't proud of what he did, but he just couldn't take it anymore. This kid had been bothering him for a year now, swearing at him, threatening him and pushing him, and he just couldn't take it anymore.

Oh my goodness. It took me right back to my own childhood when I was bullied every single day. I lived in constant fear and I hated school. I'd either take off running for home the second the bell rang or I'd hide in the bathroom until I was sure every last student had gone home. I would take the long way home to avoid my bullies. I did whatever it took.

My kid isn't going to live like that.

Ian and I talked to Sam about it and how he could have handled himself better. Ian showed him some self-defence moves. We said if someone hits him first it's ok to defend himself, just drop whatever he may have in his hands at the time and not use it as a weapon. We didn't punish him because the school already took care of that.

Turns out that the other kid got a one-day suspension.

Then on Monday Sam was holding the door for the kids in the class and this same boy started bugging him. Sam told him he had the door and to please just go back in line. The boy got up in Sam's face asking him if he wanted him to punch him in the face again. Sam said "just try it" and the kid backed off.

Today I called the vice principal to discuss the entire issue, and to give him some background on this boy from last year. I told him that Sam said he wasn't proud of what he did, and that he's becoming more withdrawn at home, which is a huge danger sign to me.

The vice principal took a bunch of notes and said he would speak with the teacher. I said that as a parent it's my job to protect my child, and as an educator it's his job to protect him while he's at school, and we needed to work alongside each other to eliminate this problem.

The conversation went well, he thanked me for calling and asked me to report any further issues. I'm prepared to take this as far as I have to, to ensure my son's safety at school. Bullying isn't something we can take lightly.

Being that I was constantly bullied as a child, it's definitely a hot spot for me. I've certainly moved on from it and don't carry it with me every minute of the day. But there are wounds. I want to protect my children from those same wounds.

Where do you stand on bullying? How far would you go to protect your child? I'm interested in your thoughts and opinions on this topic.