It's hard being a mother.
Let me rephrase this: It's hard to be a mother of girls.
Ian and I are very intentional with our children and spend a lot of time telling them that we love them. We are big huggers in our family and "I love you" is spoken freely and often. It's whispered and it's shouted.
There is an abundance of love in our home.
But we don't just tell them that we love them. We tell them why. We tell them they are each special in their own individual ways and have gifts because God crafted them that way. We list their beautiful qualities one by one. We tell them that they have purpose in this world, and that God will use them for great things. That they can do anything through Christ who gives them strength.
We remind them that it is enough to be who God created them to be and that they don't have to try to be something or someone they aren't. They are enough.
But once they step outside of our home, our children - our daughters - are bombarded with messages that tell them otherwise.
The outside world tells them that beauty is what truly matters. Starving yourself to be super skinny. Tons of makeup. Revealing clothing. Drinking and smoking are cool. Everyone does drugs.
Can't afford something you want? Steal it. Want to keep that boyfriend? Sleep with him. Want to feel loved and never lonely again? Have a baby.
Lies. All lies.
I hate standing in the checkout line with my daughters because of the magazine covers they see. Half dressed, half starved, overly made up and under dressed women that define what the world considers to be beautiful.
I see Julie looking at these magazines in the store, then looking at herself in the mirror when we get home, and I want to scream that those women don't look like that in real life! That beauty comes from within, and that type of beauty is what truly lasts. That modesty and self respect are beautiful qualities all on their own.
Would she even hear me?
Did I hear my mother saying the same thing?
No.
Today I learned something that is weighing so heavily on my heart. I wish I could blog it out but I can't.
My heart hurts and I want to cry. I feel helpless.
I hurt for young girls that are faced with choices and situations that they aren't prepared to make. There is so much pressure to be more than what they are. To fill voids in their lives with things that aren't healthy and will change who they are intended to be.
Will you please pray with me not only for our daughters, but every young girl who is believing the lies the media feeds them, and are making grown up choices that they aren't prepared to make?
They need us, my friends. They need us.
:(
ReplyDeletePraying.
(Hugs)
Wow. That was a heavy post but so spot on. I haven't dealt with that too much in my daughter yet. But our son notices the magazines and such. Thankfully right now his questions are always something like why to women think they need to dress like that to be beautiful? Why can't they see how special they are already? Prayerfully he will stay that was as I worry for my son and the things the world tries to sell him as well. But as the older brother I hope too that his thinking will help shape my daughter's thinking too. He does tell her she is beautiful and does not need to show off her body.
ReplyDeletePraying, praying, daily praying for what the world tries to sell our children. Thankfully I am not alone in this battle.
I agree with everything you said whole heartedly. It frightens me to the core as I think about my daughter starting school and all the ugly things in the world she is going to be exposed to. How to protect her, without sheltering her, how to properly expose her, without overly doing so. How to encourage her self esteem without making her have a huge ego. Girls are tough, no doubt about it. But I feel that with love, honesty, prayer, and a little luck, they will be ok.
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