I went a whole week with out using Twitter or Facebook and I survived.
Not just survived... I lived.
Lived... as in being present in each moment, with each person I was with. I wasn't constantly checking my phone to see if anyone tweeted me, or who was doing what on Facebook.
I lived, and I was present.
While I would like to be able to say that I didn't miss it at all ... that would be a big fat lie. It is abundantly clear to me how addicted I have become to them. It's good to be aware of that though, and now I need to consider what kind of boundaries I can put in place to control how much time I spend on them going forward.
I've stopped reading blogs that are negative and I feel so much better. Why I read them in the first place, I have no idea. I don't want to be a bitter and judgemental person, and that's what I was becoming.
Garbage in, garbage out.... see?
I spent a lot of time talking to God this past week. (Some of the things we talked about was how I was missing Twitter and Facebook... don't judge now). Bible verses that I've read many times before became fresh and really struck a chord with me.
I've also realized how I put my happiness in certain things, or ideas of things. In my quiet time this week I really sensed that I need to learn how to be happy and content in all circumstances, because there isn't going to be one single event or thing that is going to make me happy. It's going to come from my Father.
Most of the time I feel rather peaceful with where I am these days. It isn't where I want to be, you know that. But God knows that too, but He has me here for a reason so I don't want to miss it. I've tried to slow down and remember these are the days... and I don't want to look back on them and feel bitter because I didn't have things exactly the way I wanted them. I'm choosing joy. Sometimes hourly, but I'm doing it.
What else did I do this week?
I've defined certain friendships that aren't good for me and have decided to stop chasing after them. Should these people decide they want a friendship with me, great. But in the meantime I'm putting boundaries around them and I'm going to give them space. I don't need to chase anyone down.
I've made amends with someone that I've been missing very much. I don't know where we will go from here, but that weight is off my heart. I'm trusting that God will do something with us.
I've decided that I will no longer obsess about the number of people follow me on twitter, read my blog, or I am friends with on Facebook. I love that people find me interesting enough to follow me and my blog. But I'm choosing to be more concerned with the quality of the people in my life, not the quantity. I'm not going to stress about what to blog about or if it will please the people reading it. I cannot control who reads my blog (oh how I wish I could!) so I'm just not going to let it bother me anymore.
I've also decided that just because people in my life have the ability to hurt me, I have a choice about what I take from it. And I choose to take nothing. My self worth isn't going to come from anyone but God and who He says I am.
I had a lot of time to think this week, didn't I?
Maybe I need a SECOND week off....?