It's Sunday night and I'm pooped.
Friday we had three showings - two scheduled for the morning, and a surprise one in the evening. We took the children to McDonald's for dinner and then wandered around Walmart for a bit. I love wandering around Walmart. It's on my top ten list of favourite things to do.
Saturday was our sweet Mattie's first birthday. I woke up early and watched him while he slept. Ian and I kept joking about the funny things that happened during our labour and delivery. Like how I wouldn't start pushing until 9:12 because I could not have him born at 9:11. And at 9:17 am we sang Happy Birthday to him.
His birthday party was in the afternoon. My mom, Ian's parents and our dear friend Gary came to celebrate our little guy. Ian bbq'd burgers and hot dogs, and I had baked his birthday cake. I set the cake down in front of him and his eyes went wide, then he started crying as we all sang Happy Birthday. That was short lived when he realized he wasn't going to get into trouble for grabbing his cake. With both hands! He tasted the frosting and was one happy little boy. It was all over his face, both his arms, his shirt, both legs, and the tray of his high chair... which he was licking... So precious.
So, I'm the mother of one newly minted one year old.
Today I woke up and felt lousy. I've had this cold for two weeks now and it's just not going away. I ended up missing church because I just felt so worn out. I think that makes three weeks of church in a row that I've missed. I don't like that.
In addition to feeling lousy with this cold, I also struggled with a lot of anxiety this morning. Our church picnic was this afternoon AND we had our first open house.
I get very anxious about having people in my house. It's a sore spot with Ian and me because he is very social and loves to have people over. I am - believe it or not - extremely shy and I'm always worried people will criticize me or judge me.
But having strangers in my home? That's just too much for me. Seriously. I have felt so much anxiety this week. When someone books a showing, they have to do it though a real estate agent, and their information is recorded. But for an open house? Anyone can walk off the street and into my house. My bedroom. My children's bedrooms.
And so, this morning I had a meltdown. I felt so filled with anxiety I just couldn't help it. Poor Ian. I know an open house is a necessity but I just hate the idea of all that stranger danger in my house. No idea how many people came - or if any of my nosy neighbours came through the house while we were gone. Two more showings booked for tomorrow.
And then there was the church picnic. A social situation. I was worried about who I would sit with, would we find shade for Matthew, how many stupid things would I end up saying. Crazy right?
Mom kept Willow at her house for us so he'd be out of the way for the open house and we headed up to the Scott Mission Camp for the picnic. As usual, I shouldn't have worried about anything. We found a large patch of shade and several people seeking shade as well joined us and there were lots of people to talk to. I loved watching Sam and Julie heading off to hang out with their friends, and even Jordan found someone to play with. I don't think Matthew liked the feel of the grass because he never left the blanket. He just crawled back and forth.
And here I am, tucked into bed, ready to have an early night.
If you are of the praying kind, I'd appreciate it if you would keep Ian in your prayers tomorrow. He's working on something that we are praying will go in his favour and if it does, I'll be sure to tell you about it. I figure the more voices that pester God on his behalf the better!
And that's a wrap!