Love

It's been awhile since I've posted here. But just because I haven't posted doesn't mean things aren't happening!

I've continued to work on my relationship with my Heavenly Father, giving all my hurts, bitterness, resentments, anger, and disappointments to Him. He has taken every single one of them and in return I am more at peace. Everytime I feel fearful or resentful, I visualize putting that feeling into a bag, then putting the bag on a conveyor belt that takes it to God. It's gone. I know that nothing I put on that conveyor is too big for God to handle. He's in charge and that is such a great comfort to me.

I've strugged over the events of this year and I think I am finally hearing what He is trying to tell me, the things He is trying to teach me. That the definition of who I am doesn't come from another person or a job - it comes from Him alone. I am a child of God! I am His chosen one! He knows everything I have ever done and will ever do and He loves me! All my imperfections and weaknesses and sins - He loves all of me! He is endlessly patient and forgiving of me. The love He has for me is overwhelming and I am so grateful for it.

So, I've tried to relax in life. Enjoy what comes today. It isn't always easy. Sometimes it's just plain hard to wait. But I know that He knows all the deepest desires of my heart and I know that He has a plan for my life. As much as I hope to have the things I want, I know that what He has planned for me is greater than anything I could dream up myself.

There has been some movement on my job search. I sent out a resume last Saturday and was called on Sunday evening and met with a woman on Tuesday afternoon. She was recruiting for the position but interviewed me at her client's site. She said she was impressed with how long I've been at my current company, liked my resume and liked me, and requested that I come back on Friday. I met with the owner, the accounting manager and the operations manager. I think it went well, the job sounds like a big, big challenge and I hope they liked what I could offer them. It's all in God's hands now. If that's where He wants me and can best use me, then He will bring it about for me there. If not, then I trust that there will be something better coming down the line. He knows me the best so He has my complete trust.

My sister is seeking these days. Oh how I want her to come to the Lord. She is so lost. God wants her to be free! I've tried to tell her of His love for her so many times but something just covers her ears and she can't hear me. Last night we were sitting in my church, waiting for the drama presentation to begin, talking together, and I told her that I was trusting in God about my current work situation and the job I am waiting to hear about. She just looked at me and said "You really put a lot of trust in Him, don't you?" and I just smiled and told her that He was my foundation, everything I stood for, He has done wonderful things in my life and blessed me abundantly. That He never leaves me. The drama really moved her and she cried. When it was over she looked down at the bibles on the backs of the chairs in front of us. "Is that the same bible that Catholics read?" Yes, I said and gave her one to take home with her. I don't know what line spoke to her, or what touched her, but she clutched that bible as she left. Will she read it? I don't know. It isn't up to me to save her. All I can to is point her in the right direction and live my life in a way that she can see His love. When she was leaving I hugged her and told her that Jesus was the same no matter what church she goes to, that He loves her and wants her to know Him.

Do you know Him? Do you want to know Him? He loves you, and it doesn't matter where you are in your life, or what you have done - He sees the true you and He loves you. He wants you to know Him and to trust Him. People will come and go in your life, but He will never leave you. He loves you so much, that He sent His only son to die for you. For YOU. So that through Him your sins could be forgiven and you could live life more abundantly. It doesn't matter where you are - reach out to Him, call out for Him and He will meet you where you are. I promise.