Sunday, April 19, 2009

Stuff & Such

It feels so weird to know that I'm going to work tomorrow after being out of the business loop for so long. And the pressure is starting. You know what I mean. The pressure to get everything done over the weekend so that you can head off to work Monday morning, knowing everything is in order at home.

Except it's not. My laundry is way behind. Almost as far behind as my housework is. And as I sit here typing this, I just remembered that I need to take something out of the freezer for dinner tonight.

And my chest feels so tight and my heart hurts. I'm going to miss being with Jordan all day, caring for her and loving on her. And I'll miss seeing the children right after school, excitedly telling me about their days, moaning about their homework assignments. I'll miss fixing lunch... and preparing dinner... and puttering. I will miss hanging out with Ian. I'll miss the freedom of coming and going as I wish.

But getting a paycheque again will be sweet. And it will feel good to get back into my field and see if I've still got what it takes to produce results. I feel like I can, but that may change after Day 1!

There is good and bad in everything, isn't there? Time to focus on the good.

Yesterday Sam and I went to see Monsters vs Aliens. Ian took Jules last weekend because Sam was sick, and he fell asleep towards the end, so he doesn't know how the movie ended. When we came home, he asked me how it was, and I said that I'd tell him the ending if he'd tell me what happened in the middle.

Yes... two hours of my life I'll never get back. Ok, it wasn't really that bad. Not my favourite, but it wasn't that bad. The time alone with Sam was awesome though.

After I dropped Sam off, I picked up Jules and we headed over to Chapters. I used the last of my gift card from Christmas and bought Charley's Web by Joy Fielding. I've been waiting forever for it to come out in softcover and now it's mine! We then headed over to the Tim Horton's that Jen, Cindy and I go to every week and even sat at "our table".

Yeah... we have an "our table" because we are there each week, oh so faithfully. And such faithfulness comes with perks such as that. If we get there and others are sitting at "our table" then we are not above sending looks and the odd glare at the intruders until they leave.

She was so cute, wanting to know who sat where, what we ordered, what we talked about every week. It was really nice to be able to focus just on her, and to hear her thoughts and concerns about things. She often feels left out or in the way. I consider that a personal failing, because I always strive to make them each feel special and important. But sometimes (most times?) I guess I fall short...

The girls both have colds. Again. I managed to get Jordan to eat some yogurt last night, but then she erupted like a volcano. I was so impressed with what she produced that I stopped trying to catch it in the tea towel. I just stood there, mesmerized. I think she heaved up half her body weight. Once she was done I bathed her in the sink and gave her fresh pjs and she fell asleep in my arms. She then proceeded to sleep for the next 10+ hours.

This morning there was an ambulance outside Buddy Across The Street's house. I don't know who it was for, and I don't know if they took anyone away, but I'm concerned.

I got a little thrill this morning when I discovered that someone in India and Nunavut read my blog.

India and Nunavut!!

Very exciting.

Alright, I am off to do all those things that need doing so that I can head out to the workforce tomorrow morning knowing all is in order at home.



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